QUESTION: Hello to both and ….hmm, welcome to e-NALLAX.
JUDAS: Well go, you mean…(comment followed by a really treacherous smile)
MESALINA: …go and never be back, I might add!!
Q.: Hey, hang on for a moment. Let’s deal with this with an open mind. You are here to freely express your opinion about this e-magazine. Nothing more, nothing less!
J.: Hmmm. I might say some really nasty things here, you know. Are you ready for that?
M.: Me too! I wouldn’t trade my rights of freedom of expression, not for anything less than…(Mesalina stopped slightly embarassed, probably of what she was about to say…)
Q.: OK, OK, terms accepted! Anyway let me introduce you to our readers. I presume you both have never gone beyond elementary school, have you?
J.: I have a degree in Law from Tel Aviv university.
M.: And I have one in Roman History, plus a PhD in “Controversial Historic Couples”…
Q.: Whoops, could never imagine that. But studies do not allways go along with high IQ, do they?
J.: I am sure you are not implying anything by that. Because this would have certain immediate implications… I could be more implacable than you could imagine sir and you would end up imploring me to stop….
M.: Hope some sense is implanted in your brain mr. e-NALLAX man!!
Q.: Come on you people, where is your sense of humor? You couldn’t possibly believe that I was trying to depreciate you…
J.: I appreciate you saying that…
M.: Hey, are we ever going to deal with the subject of this interview?
Q.: You are right dear mis! (…tress) [I added almost whispering]
M.: I have an acute hearing, if that can save you from more such insulting comments. The only reason I am still staying here is that I want to tell the people about your rotten magazine… (plus that Judas here is a cutie… she whispered giggling).
J.: (… simply giggled back with no reason, since his hearing was not that acute)…
Q.: So let us not beat about the bush here any longer!!
M.: Stop that, my man! You know I have noticed how improperly you’ ve treated the President so far. That is one of the reasons I hated your magazine….
J.: Yeah, me too. What gives you the right to ridicule the only remaining superpower?
Q.: That is what I call an unexpected change of subject, but in any case let me humbly apologize! Still, hasn’t the press the right to satirize public personalities and situations? (The phrase was preceded by a sardonious smile)..
J.: You call yourselves Press? Let me soundly laugh. You are more like Pirates of Cyberspace.
M.: …and more! You are a nothingness gasping for some publicity air.
Q.: Wow, isn’t the plot suddenly thickening? So what’s so bad for some people to try and take advantage from the 21st century reality? Why should only the rich and mighty have a right to be a part of the game?
J.: Anonimity. That is what’s so bad. You can go out in cyberspace, hidden behind your anonimity, and shoot at will, without finding yourselves in any danger of being fired back.
M.: …or receiving your shit back!!
Q.: Hey, aren’t you touchy? After all, who would care about some anonymous shit, if that it is what we produce? Excuse me the use of language, but consider it as self-defense…
J.: Such material smells wherever it comes from. And you sir produce it in great quantities. You present imaginary interviews, profoundly because of your inability to interview real people, you give us lousy translated poems and half recorded songs…
M.: Yeah. Not to mention the rotten page design… And there is much more!!
Q.: But in any case we are not anonymous. If someone wants to know who we really are he should only ask about it.
J.: Does this include some D.A. or the police?
M.: Got him babe!! Got him right between the eyes. Come one! Tell him more about his unworthy e-magazine. Magazine my ass!
Q.: Some people seem to have a different opinion. Anyway… Doesn’t everything have two sides?
J.: Might be true… But I am definitely not on your side.
M.:And I am definitely on Judas’s side.
Q.: Isn’t there anything you liked in e-NALLAX?
J.: Sure…Its last page, because I knew I would soon be relieved of it.
M.: (sounding graciously feminine). And I liked that cartoon of Charlie Brown being allergic to women or something…
Q.: But how do you judge the fact that e-NALLAX is interviewing you and let such negative criticism go public? Don’t you consider this somehow suicidal?
J.: (Judas seemed a little startled by the question but soon he proceeded…) This is some kind of allibi for you…
M.: Yeah… plus it is a lullaby for readers. After all who is going to pay attention to accusations of 2 imaginary persons?
J.: …who by the way you so unscrupulously named after 2 -considered to be - corrupt historic personalities!
Q.: (Now I was a little bit startled. This was getting out of schedule I thought and tried to put the conversation back in track…) Ok. You are right about that. It was a bad choice of names. But e-NALLAX, despite what you are saying, despite its weaknesses, has good intentions. Why do you not accept that?
J.: Nero in his own mind had good intentions as well.
M.: So had Judas…
Q.: Hang on… I thought Judas betrayed his master for money and Nero destroyed Rome and blamed that on Christians. I guess what you are saying here is simply preposterous.
J.: Depends on each one’s historic resources. After all, everything has two sides. Your words not mine!!
M.: Plus… if you could call me Afrodite instead of Mesalina, I might be a little less harsh on you (she giggled in satisfaction…)
Q.: So, does this mean that you are preoccupied and not objective about e-NALLAX?
J.: It means that we both decided not to let you use us as puppets to achieve your goal, which was to present a funny and apparently subversive falsified interview, to show once more how seemingly witty you are.
M.: ‘Cause you are not…
Q.: So does this mean that your real opinion of e-NALLAX might actually be different than the one being expressed above?
J.: (being thoughtful for some moments…) You created me as your allibi, as I said before. Now let me be the voice of your conscience and not answer this last question. Only this I tell you! Let this question be what it really is. The decoration of your insecurity and doubtfulness….
M.: ...I couldn’t have said it better!!
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Judas as photographed by e-NALLAX in Sinai desert 2 weeks ago. Deliberately hiding his face, he still lets a fierce look escape his orange head cover, a presage of what is going to follow in his interview.... 
Mesalina refused to be photographed for e-NALLAX. She permitted us though to publish a childhood picture of hers during carnival festivities in Trinidad, where she had been with her prents. She insisted that there is a certain symbolism in this picture that connects it with e-NALLAX's identity!! 
Whoops, terribly sorry! Some site building daemon has installed a strange VIRUS in this page and put this totally irrelevant and despeakable picture in our well respected e-magazine! Honorable readers are kindly requested to disregard this vulgar image from their impression of e-NALLAX...
THE EDITOR |
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